Many wonderful steps have been taken in this struggle for the civil rights of the Occupationally-Challenged (the “OC”), but we have so much farther to go! It is not fair that some OC are denied the basic human right of leisure, experienced in front of a flat-screen television in HD. How self-centered have we become that there are homes with 2 or even 3 plasma televisions yet some of our downtrodden still have to stare at tube televisions in standard definition?
It is also inhumane how some Americans are not allowed to experience the joy of owning a new car. Why should one’s propensity for inactivity inhibit this right which is freely enjoyed by so many? I, for one, will not own a new car until every American (or undocumented non-worker) is able to own a new car. How can we call this the “Land of the Free”, when everything has a price-tag??
Finally, it is time to stop differentiating between workers and non-workers, as if one segment is of greater worth to society. It is time to rid ourselves of the stigma of non-work and realize that were it not for all of those thousands of industrious non-workers out there, prosperous white liberals would have no outlet for their guilt and self-hatred. In addition to the weekly “jobs” report, we should publish the weekly FUNemployed report, detailing fun things that OCs were able to accomplish during their subsidized non-workweek.
Let’s face it, our economy is not going to improve anytime soon, so why not embrace the new face of America and embrace our inner bums? Pass me a stack of Obama Money and let’s go vote thrice.
