Thank you. I have never seen one before. Unless you live in Alaska or Siberia, leave it off my feed.
Your glistening legs look so hot… oh wait that’s only because you did the Lo-Fi filter. Thanks for keeping it to just your kneecaps though because if that was all you were willing to show, we probably didn’t want to see the rest.
“LOOK HOW MUCH FUN I’M HAVING AND I’M SO COOL BECAUSE I’M DRINKING ALCOHOL!” I’m going to assume your stupid hashtags underneath are #beerthirty #fiveoclocksomewhere #sexonthebeach.
Basically, what you’re admitting to the world with your hundreds of pictures of your cats is that, you’re single…. or you’re jealous of your friends with children and this is the only way you know how to compete. A couple now in then is fine, but 3 a day? Bet you’re watching Ellen too.
Congratulations, you can reproduce. I’m not interested in the cake your child smashed, their first bowel movement, or their first steps, because you know why…. it’s not my child. With everything being documented on the internet these days, leave your child off of it. There are enough people looking into our business, don’t voluntarily give it to them.
OOTD (Outfit of the Day)
I just don’t know if I would get any sleep if Jessica didn’t post her “outfit of the day” everyday! It is comical to make fun of all the fashion mistakes you’re making though.
The worst of the worst of the worst. Stop. Stop now. Isn’t this what your profile picture is for? I don’t need to see you throwing up a peace sign, a smoochy face, or pushing your boobs together (even though you didn’t really mean to, it just happened!) You know how you criticize when you see someone else’s selfie? Yeah, that’s what we’re doing to yours.
Where to begin? I’m so cute holding up my Hello Kitty iPhone case and looking at the phone instead of into the mirror because I’m actually embarrassed I’m doing this in the first place. More often than not, the subject in the picture is looking at themselves on the phone. What the f**k?
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