In Iowa it is legal to have an abortion without a doctor physically in the room. Yeah, I know it sounds crazy. But apparently killing a baby is pretty easy. What could go wrong? Abortion Doc’s can just phone it in. Light up the Skype and rock and roll. One less human to worry about creating a carbon footprint, eating fat foods, drinking big soft drinks, driving big gas hog trucks, or shooting those evil guns, and God forbid, maybe voting Republican. I mean it’s really just a glob of cells anyway. Not an insanely-unique-one-of-a-kind-never-to-be-seen-or-heard-from-again-perfect-creation. Noooo.
So hey, don’t worry about being responsible with your sex life…you’ve got a problem…got a little bun in the oven…this is the new age man…c’mon, get rid of it. It’s your body, right? But wait, aren’t you just a bunch of cells? Incredibly unique cells that your mother nurtured until birth and either gave you up for adoption or raised you to adulthood. Maybe you should call your dear old mom and thank her for not frying you with acid while you were a wee little thing, or better yet, Skype her, it’s all the rage.
While you have mom on the Skype, ask her a couple questions. How about something like…hey mom…did I ever cry a lot when I was a baby? Did I ever cause you any sleepless nights? Did you have enough money when I was born? Did you worry about finances, discipline, or education? Did you worry that I was not going to be perfect? I mean what if I had been disabled or mentally challenged? Did you worry about any of those things? Just watch her face. It will be a face of confusion as mom is racked with guilt and wonders about the time she did drop your dumb-liberal-a$$ on your head. She might reach for the Vodka as she realizes you’re a self-serving, moronic drain on society.
Are you kidding me? There is not one mother or father (but no need to mention them here at all) who hasn’t felt these things. Yeah, babies cry, sometimes a lot! Yeah, they cost a lot, too. Oh yeah, you have to commit to train them and teach them pretty much forever. Yeah there’s that, and also, you do kinda worry a lot, because you know it’s a dangerous world, a million things could go wrong. Mostly, they’re insanely inconvenient to your selfishness. So, apparently INCONVENIENCE is a reasonable explanation to eliminate a life from existence.
The State House of Representatives in Iowa recently passed a bill largely along party lines making it illegal to Skype in your abortion. All the Iowa Dems but 3 voted to kill babies over the internet and all the Repubs save one voted that using anything Al Gore created to kill anyone is a bad idea. This bill didn’t outlaw abortion, oh no, nothing that sacred. It just said that you actually have to get someone to drive your prego butt to the clinic and see an actual doctor to kill your baby you accidentally created.
Oops, it’s all about you anyway. You know because it is really a nuisance to your life…I mean who would want you “saddled with a baby” as our dear leader has stated. It’s not like other people out there might want your baby. How crazy to think that someone else might actually be crying out in the dark hoping for a baby just like the one you are about to Skype-kill. No that would be crazy!
Adoption in America: Safe, legal, and rare…stay tuned for Skype Kills More Than Drones Part II, where I get personal with the chick in Iowa who caused this rant and she ain’t no Barbie! Listen to this classic as a teaser…oh yeah, Beth, I hear you calling…
Author, S.C. Sherman’s latest novel titled Mercy Shot is available for purchase at www.scsherman.com and Kindle version is available on Amazon.com. S.C. Sherman is available for speaking events and members of the media feel free to contact him for interviews. If you are interested in bulk purchasing or resale of Mercy Shot, please contact S.C. Sherman via email firstname.lastname@example.org. Also, go LIKE www.facebook.com/mercyshot to stay up to date on all things Mercy Shot. All new LIKES are entered into a drawing to win a Safari Cigar Sampler Pack.
Doug ‘The Big Dawg’ Giles’ reviews Mercy Shot: “Mercy Shot is a riveting, modern tale of the twisted and insidious war that’s being waged against our Second Amendment rights. S.C. Sherman does a great job of forecasting in this timely tome of how things could possibly go down. My advice is to a.)Read this book and b.) Buy a stack of guns and ammo, pretty damn quick. Molon Labe.” –Doug Giles, CEO of ClashDaily.com