The often disdained, orange-hued, crying game, that was John Boehner is retiring. And why not? Spend some time with the family. Enjoy the fruits of years of service. No really, what gives? Why is he stepping down right now? So what is the real reason Johnny is calling it quits? We may never know until the memoir.
Most likely his situation became untenable after years of tone deafness to the base of the Republican Party and two choices became obvious. And both choices were the door. An alliance of sorts between the House Freedom Caucus, the Tea Party folks, and the Republican Opportunity Society brought together a perfect storm via a pending motion to vacate the chair by HFC member Rep. Mark Meadows (R-N.C.) and JB is headed to the locker room to have a smoke and undo his tie.
So what now? Who’s the next lamb to slaughter? Who wants the gavel and the number three spot in the most powerful country on the planet? No, it’s not Russia you Commie! It’s ‘Merica!
Kevin McCarthy was in the back of the room like Donkey in Shrek…pick me! That didn’t last long. Kevin is out. The HFC group was keen to Daniel Webster, but he’s not pulling the 218 votes needed to take power.
No one really has the votes, and the race seems wide open. The establishment is focusing in on Paul Ryan as their next to fully join the dark side. Even Ryan may not have the votes, no matter how bad the elite of the GOP want him to. The HFC and the grass roots people are not going quietly into the good night.
So who then? Trey Gowdy? Justin Amash? Maybe Jason Chaffetz? How about Mick Mulvaney or Jim Jordan? Who are they? Nobody, that’s who, or maybe Palpatine, it’s tough to tell, but this feels like Star Wars and we are waiting for a humble leader to rise unwillingly to power only to crush all freedom in the galaxy and usher in a new age of darkness and oppression.
Ryan, Webster, and Chaffetz, all good candidates by some standards have serious cronyism troubles. Ryan voted for the bailout and Obamacare. Fail. I wouldn’t be surprised if one of these guys owned a yacht called, the Back Room Deal, with a picture of Boehner in the cabin. If not Boehner, then Sheldon Adelson. Who’s he? The Jabba the Hut of Vegas that’s who. I wrote about him months ago. He’s been trying to get congress to outlaw his gambling competition through a sweet little black dress called the RAWA. That stands for, bend over online gambling companies, The Restoration of Americas Wire Act is here to be your boss. That beautiful piece of legislation would essentially take control of gambling away from the states. And both Chaffetz and Webster bought the KY for that one and voted for it.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m sick and tired of the Fan Duel commercials interrupting by football and baseball games. It’s almost enough to make me pine for more Cialis commercials; no not really. Anyway, the funny thing about the constant barrage of Fan Duel commercials is that, it is enticing me to commit a crime. I live in Iowa. Fan Duel is illegal here. I could go to jail for 10 years if I logged on and bet the house on Tom Brady. States’ rights are pretty cool. If I am determined to gamble on Fan Duel or Draft Kings, I can move to a different state or go to Des Moines and make my local area actually represent our local people.
My betting habits in Iowa are the least of the online gamblers concerns. Both Fan Duel and Draft Kings have scandals and problems of their own. They are both being investigated by Jabba, I mean by the FBI and the DOJ. Golly…what a surprise. That ought to make Sheldon happy. Nice to have friends in the right places of government. Amazing what can be accomplished with cold hard cash.
The point is the people are sick and tired of cronyism and corruption. The HFC and the other grass roots groups better remember John Boehner’s tenure as a cautionary tale. Keep the power of the House with the people. Reject the Kingmakers of the donor class. If not, they will be forced out as well and cast on the heap of irrelevancy.
I don’t know who will end up as Speaker, but several of the prime candidates are severely flawed. You know it’s bad when Gingrich has a better chance of winning the Speakers gavel than an actual member of congress.