By Thomas Holmes
It’s looking like, once again, the Democratic presidential frontrunners are relying on the stupidity of the Millennial generation to propel them to the White House. Hey, it worked in 2008 and 2012 when the youngsters were so in love with the idea of being the first generation to elect a black president (when not actually being half white suits Obama) they didn’t seem to care that Barack was ripping them off in order for Obamacare to have any chance.
Fast forward to 2015 and now you’ve got a few old white people hoping all that college liberal indoctrination is enough to swing one of them into the White House. Well, according to Forbes, writing on this week’s Democratic debate, it’s looking like we can thank The Stupidest Generation for all the success Socialist Bernie Sanders is enjoying.
I’d make an effort to speak to the Millennials about how they’re being bamboozled and have no clue what they’re getting all of us into but, I’m afraid if I use any words more than two syllables, I’ll just lose them.
Seriously kids, all joking aside, you do know there’s no such thing as “free education” right? You are aware that giant taxes on Wall Street investments isn’t stealing from the evil rich to give to the noble poor, but it’s actually taking money from you’re parent’s 401(k)’s as well as your own, which you’ve only just started? There’s a reason not every day is Christmas, no matter what Uncle Bernie says.
Maybe a bedtime story would get through to those Millennial toddlers. Come on children, brush your teeth, wipe your nose- with a tissue this time– and hop into bed. See kids, once upon a time, there was this far away fairy land that Bernie Sanders liked to call “Socialist Democracies” like Finland and Norway. In this pretend land everything was wonderful and perfect because education and healthcare were “free” and therefore better than in mean-old America.
Uncle Bernie liked to see if he could fool dumb Millennials into thinking that these Socialist utopias weren’t fairly lands but real and wonderful. Uncle Bernie usually had to “forget” facts that are actually real. Silly things like, those countries hadn’t put money towards a meaningful military budget since World War II because mean-old America was protecting them with their military budgets for the last 70 years. Uncle Bernie also tended to forget that Finland’s government owns a debt of 59.3% of their GDP or that Norway has a 14% youth unemployment rate and can’t hire engineers despite the dire need for them even though everyone got a free education. What’s the problem you’d be smart to ask? Would you work 12 hour days as an engineer when you’ve already successfully lived your whole life off the dole?
Yep, Uncle Bernie sure like his fairy tales, it’s just too bad the Millennial brats seem to like believing them just as much.