Am I the only white person in America getting sick of being called a racist? I don’t think so. But just to be sure, I broke out my personal copy of the Coryell genealogy and gave it a quick read-through. As it turns out, the first of the Coryell clan (that’s “Clan” not “Klan”) to settle in America sailed from England near the start of the 18th century. The first Coryell’s settled in New Jersey and from there gradually moved inland to Michigan where I live now. As it turns out, my ancestors were more likely to fight to free the slaves than they were to own them. So I guess my ancestors were not racists.
That brings us to present day. So I gave myself a “racism” test.
Question – Have you ever owned a black person?
Answer – No
Question – Have you ever used the “N” word?
Answer – No
Question – Do you believe the white race to be superior to the black race?
Answer – No
Question – Do you have any black friends?
Answer – Yes
“Holy Hannah, Batman! I passed the test! I’m not a racist!”
Or am I? Maybe I’m really a racist deep down inside and I just don’t know it yet? Perhaps it’s like a virus living inside me, latent, waiting to be triggered by the racist gene that’s been passed secretly down through the Coryell family for hundreds of years.
Perhaps I should take another test? This time I’ll take the Jesse Jackson, white cracker quiz. It’s short and to the point.
Question – Are you white?
Answer – Yes.
Final Grade – You’re a racist.
Wow! That was so much easier than before!
Most of you know I teach concealed-carry classes, pistol safety, tactics, all that good, fun stuff. Why just this past weekend I was on the range teaching an advanced concealed-carry class to a bunch of creepy-ass, white crackers (I can’t believe they let us racists have guns.) when I heard myself say the following: “I highly recommend that you incorporate profiling into your family and personal defense strategy. Always watch the people who statistically commit most of the crime.”
Of course, being good students, they wanted to know the stats, asking me “Who commits most of the crime?” I hesitated, wondering to myself, Do I really want to open myself up to criticism? But then I gave it to them straight. “Over fifty percent of the murders in America are committed by young, African-American males.”
You could have heard a pin drop. (And we were on a gun range with shots being fired all around us.) Most white people feel uncomfortable talking about race in any setting or context.
Let’s get this straight. I am not a racist – but I do possess pre-disposed opinions.