CHICAGO—The city of Chicago is steadily recovering from an overnight snowstorm that delayed hundreds of murders on Friday morning and will likely continue to push numerous homicides across the city drastically behind schedule, public authorities announced. “As we speak, maintenance crews are working diligently to restore public transportation, de-ice roads, and clear back alleyways so that Chicagoans can quickly resume murdering again,” Department of Streets and Sanitation spokesman Dave Michelson said of the heavy blizzard, which caused numerous homicide cancellations this morning at peak murder times.
Like Clash? Like Clash.
- Look What Was Found At TEEN JIHAD Suspects’ Home
- LMAO: #NotMyPresidentsDay Jackass SHOT by Riot Police (VIDEO)
- TRUMP IS RIGHT AGAIN: Sweden IS Experiencing A MASSIVE ‘Migrant’ Crime Wave
- LMAO: Katy Perry’s Anti-Trump Awards Stunt Backfires Hilariously
- BLACK MAGIC: Look What WITCHES Worldwide Are Planning For TRUMP
- BOOM! Jenna Jameson Just Launched An EPIC Anti-Islam Twitter Tirade
- LMAO: Dude Showboats During MMA Fight – Watch Bro DROP Him! (VIRAL VIDEO)