The more I think about this, it might be best for me to go a dog show and get my dog from a guy in the parking lot. Then I may have to have my new dog trained in Mexico or somewhere else. Somewhere a little more off the radar, a little more, undocumented. His special training could be just a little family secret. I could plead ignorance to his bomb sniffing skills and just play fetch and put a red bandana around his neck. He could act like all the other Labs, completely happy to constantly fetch sticks. All the while, he would be protecting me and my neighbors from crazy Jihadi’s. He would be kind of like a spy dog leading a double life. I like this plan.
What should we name my new bomb sniffing dog? Maybe, Sam, like Uncle Sam, or something military sounding, like Captain or Colonel, would be good. How about Sniper in honor of Chris Kyle? Maybe Shield would work since he would be my shield against destruction. How about the name Liberty? That would fit nicely. Feel free to think of the best name possible for our new bomb sniffer.
I’m sure my little Commie house dogs will be jealous, but our new Labrador is going to protect their lazy lap-dog lives. Some dogs are called to higher purpose. Labs are very loyal and love to please their owners. I’m sure our new bomb sniffer will keep us as safe as possible against these yahoos that hate our entire way of life. At least until our own government makes it illegal for private citizens to have their own bomb sniffer. Until then, we must protect our way of life any way that we can.
Buy a Labrador and make a bomb sniffer out of him. Enjoy a great dog and feel safe at the same time. What’s more American than that?
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