THWACK! 3 Reasons Elizabeth Warren Needs A Good Spanking

Written by Jerry Novick on July 22, 2014

Well, it looks like the Left has found their Hillary Clinton Replacement. With good old Hillary’s physical health in question, and her senility recently on full display, the Democrat Party needs another woman to slip into their Identity Politics Campaign for the 2016 Presidential election.

Enter Elizabeth Warren, the current Senator from Massachusetts. Warren certainly fits the bill for the next Democrat nominee: she has no real world job experience, she plays identity politics like a burning fiddle, division is her stock-in-trade, and she’s an habitual liar.

Now, when I was growing up, lying was an automatic trip to face-down-ville, waiting on my bed so that my father could take the strap to me for my sin. I don’t spank my kids – mainly because it’s so rare that they break the rules that spanking would just be cruel and useless – but lying gets the harshest of punishments that my wife and I do mete out.

I think in Elizabeth Warren’s youth, she got candy whenever she lied. Which again, makes her the perfect Progressive politician — she’s unsullied by the realities of life. But if I had my druthers, she’d meet my father after he came home from a long day of work…
Alas, with my father sadly gone, and with my not wanting to get arrested for giving Warren her just desserts, I’ll have to metaphorically spank her by shining the light of truth on her long list of public lies.

1) Her Lying Past

Elizabeth Warren first slunk onto the scene as Obama’s nominee for the head of a new and all-powerful Consumer “Protection” Bureau. But she was too radical, anti-business, and anti-money (well, anti-money that wasn’t flowing into her own personal coffers) to pass the advise-and-consent purview of the Senate.

What did they know that Obama didn’t?

Well, for starters, there was her claim that she was descended from Native American Indians, a completely unproven bit of identity politics that she had used to extort money from Harvard. And there was the fact that she had practiced law for several years without a law license. So basically, the Senate was too gun shy at the time to give its blessing to this one particular person who should have been in jail. (Oh, where were they when Eric Holder was confirmed?)

2) Her Lying Launch Speech

Unable to get a job the old-fashioned way — by earning it – Warren decided to enter politics, where lying Liberals are rewarded for their skill as distracters and deceivers. And like all modern day Progressives, she tested the waters in some financial backer’s house by floating a good sounding meme that any thinking person would see right through. But hey, thinking has never been the strong suit of Liberal Sheep.

The “There is nobody in this country who got rich on his own” statement is full of deception and lies of omission. Either that, or Warren really doesn’t know a darn thing about civics and business. While she stretches credulity to demonize middle-class business owners, she forgets to mention that they are taxpayers too, who contributed their own monies, and a large portion of the profits of their venture, to pay for those roads and police and other bits of civil infrastructure that Warren tries to use as justification for redistributing a job creator’s earned income.

But hey, it makes a great sound bite. And sadly, way too many people vote on sound bites…

3) Her Lying 11-Step Plan To The Perfect Progressive Dictatorship

Okay, Warren doesn’t actually call her list of Progressive wet dreams her “11-Step Plan To The Perfect Progressive Dictatorship.” She introduces the list as something all Progressives — and thus all Americans — should believe. And in her defense, it is the perfect campaign video, complete with many easily-digested sound bites and meme-fodder.

And every one of the 11 is a lie. I’m not going to list them here. My fingers actually refuse to type such nonsense. But you can read them at the link above.

They are all lies because she peddles them as things that are good for America and for its people. But really, they are good only for the Elitists who will make the actual legislation and rules. Oh, for sure, the bills and regulations will be given pretty names. But the devil will be in the details, and that devil will not be good for America.

I’m certain that between the time I write this and the time you read this, the media and Facebook will have once again made a hero out of Warren. They need to. She is currently the only viable option for a Left that desperately needs a new gimmick to replace Obama when his time in the White House is up.

Please, I beg of you — do not fall for the lies. But more than that, don’t let your friends and neighbors fall for these lies. Help them get beyond the sound bites. Show them the path to becoming informed voters.

Even if you have to spank them to get the message across.



Jerry Novick has spent the past 30 years writing everything from advertising to comic books - but he is fast gaining a new reputation for his focus on the relationship between God, Country, and the Constitution. By blood Jerry is Jewish, by choice he is Christian - which potentially doubles his presents in December. He makes a habit of mixing religion and politics, especially in his (mostly) Daily Devotional series: TheWriteAmerica's Patriot Devotionals. These Devotionals, and other feature articles by Jerry, can be found at