FAVORED FEW–Supreme Court Outlaws Discrimination…Sort Of

Written by Rob Morse on November 7, 2014

We used to have men and women, but that was before we had the latest ruling from the US Supreme Court. Now men and women are the same. This judicial finding was news to me, but I’m not as smart as five Supreme Court justices. Now, we have been given official notice that we’re the same. That leaves me wondering why the federal government continue to discriminate. Yes, the government discriminates! Men and women are now officially the same, so we do we really need laws to protect women or men?

We are all “people” or purple penguins now. For one thing, that means we don’t have to let men or women into college. There is no need for women-owned businesses, because people are just.. people. That makes discrimination impossible because we are all officially interchangeable. Having a Women’s Studies department is a clear sign that colleges discriminate. Quick, guys. Call an ambulance-chasing lawyer because you’re next payout has arrived with a discrimination lawsuit against the local college!

Or are some of us more equal than others in the eyes of the politicians? I bet that is what the judges mean. What they mean is that we now have a preferred victim class, and this class owns everyone else because…well, because it seems we’re not all the same after all.

You think minority women are victims, but they are given beneficial treatment under law. We ignore that fewer men than women graduate from college. That difference is a clear sign of injustice and unequal opportunities. Despite that obvious evidence of “discrimination”, we don’t see colleges lowering their admission standards for men. We don’t see colleges offer more tuition grants in order to attract more men. Guys, you do have your civil rights lawyer on speed dial?

But wait a minute. At the very top end of the performance curve, men are also smarter than women. That means it must be discrimination and cultural prejudice that is keeping smart women from graduating. That sounds sexist to me. That is why we started quotas for women in math, science and engineering. Call 1-800-LAW- SUIT.

At the bottom end of the bell curve, we see more men with mental-health and criminal behavior problems. That surely must be from gender based social discrimination. We already have some gender based and discriminatory regulations in our family-law, and those laws clearly discriminate against men based on the unequal outcomes we see. So while laws want to remove the terms mother and father, we seem determined to keep the term political winner and political loser.

We obviously need even more legal discrimination to cure these problems! We need higher legal standards of conduct for women. That way more women can go to prison and help equal the number of incarcerated men! There now. We’ve adjusted the laws so we have a nice and equal outcome. That seems fair.

You say that isn’t what the political power brokers want? They want all of us to be equal.. but they also want some of us to be more equal than others. (Thank you, George Orwell.) Then let us bring our moral standards of fairness up to date. Now we choose our victim class on how much they favor a political party. (Who knew that George Orwell was not cynical enough!)

You say that isn’t what you want? If you disagree, then you read the judges rulings and listen to the politician’s testimony. Maybe then you can explain the shifting sands of the preferred victim class.

I’ll believe we are all equal when they eliminate the EEOC. Until then, the government continues to play favorites.

Image: http://www.flickr.com/photos/17258892@N05/2588342742/