SMELLY HORSES, BAD COPS: The Stable’s Gotta be Cleaned No Matter the Horse’s Color

Published on May 3, 2015

by Les Weaver
Clash Daily Contributor

Most observers respond with great admiration when they review the Clydesdales of the famous beer company. They are beautiful, proud and nearly always perform their job with excellence. But would you admire them as much if horse turds were left on the streets or were not cleaned from their stables? The answer is, “of course not”. Do you know that a “clean-up attendant” follows close behind to keep the streets “tidy”? Would the attendant keep his job if he didn’t keep the streets and stable clean?

The same goes for the “stable” of our cities finest; the polished, uniformed police that with few exceptions do their job with pride, excellence and honor. Like the Clydesdales, the stable must be maintained clean of the turds. For this stable, the responsibility falls to the Chief. I acknowledge that some in the stable may temporarily stray from standards but the real problem is the very few that morph into pure horse turds. If ignored, the pile composed of outside turds and morphed turds grows, resulting in an invasion of flies.

Our mid-size city (59,403 in 2010) is near the population center of a “bright blue”, (progressive) State. Our “stable of the finest” is comprised of approximately 110 staff and uniformed personnel. Our chief is not old but is experienced and devoted to a clean stable. When he came to this city in 2013, he announced to public and department alike, that there was “a line in the sand” that his stable of professionals would cross at their employment peril, not considering other penalties. He has kept that vow, threat, promise. But the stable is not without the need for periodically cleaning out a turd.

Recently, one occupant of this city’s stable morphed into a horse turd. Though off duty, this steed was pulled over and arrested for DUII, having blown a .183 in a .08 state. Guilt was admitted and as promised about that line in the sand, he lost his job. But as a local front page story, this horse turd is now threatening legal action against the stable master claiming his reason for firing was not the admitted DUII but rather his breeding. Seems that because his pedigree, (race) is not of the same lineage as the stable master’s, he should be granted a pass for over sipping and driving, a crime for which I would be jailed, heavily fined and lose my license. I can only assume that a “progressive” attorney will try to convince a jury that a uniformed turd does not stink as bad as a civilian turd.

And as a final suggestion; A Sharp-ton idea is to send all of the steeds to the sausage factory and bring in burros, (aka jackasses).

I ask, would you each and all rather live where law is equally applied or where anything goes?