DEAR AMERICA: Does Being White and Attractive OPPRESS Minorities?

Written by Thomas Holmes on April 29, 2016

And you thought you might actually make it to the weekend without yet another dose of social justice lunacy. In this case, the University of Washington quickly retracted their athletic department’s infographic that accompanied their cheerleader recruitment campaign.

According to The Seattle Times, on Tuesday, the University did a complete 180 on the picture they released across the campus which was intended to provide dress and makeup pointers to potential cheerleader candidates:

Screen Shot 2016-04-29 at 7.49.55 PM

Now let’s be clear here, no one is fainting away in stunned horror with claims of sexism, which would at least be consistent with the feminist narrative towards things like cheerleaders. Nope. This is now overtly racist because the graphic depicted an attractive blonde.

“I can’t believe this is real,” Jazmine Perez, a U of W student, told The Seattle Times. ““One of the first things that comes mind is objectification and idealization of Western beauty, which are values I would like to believe the University doesn’t want to perpetuate. As a student of color who looks nothing like the student in the poster, this feels very exclusive.”

Well, Jazmine, if that’s how you feel than it must be true. That’s how the world works, right? I hate to remind Jazmine, that, in the midst of her suffering at the hands of “western beauty”, that the University of Washington is one of the most western –located colleges in the most western society in the world. Also, unless she’s here on some scholarship from India or China, she is a member of said western society.

So tell me, what’s a more accurate depiction of western beauty? Oh right, progressivism is supposed to be about celebrating diversity. Except when society is asking you to celebrate diversity that you don’t like, then you’re the victim and everyone else is the racist. Sorry, I forgot my place.

Remember when racial justice was about getting people to effectively not see skin color at all? Those were the days. Then the libs recognized the tremendous profit in convincing minorities to only see skin color and to only interpret things through a victim lens. Of course a simple poster that guides cheerleaders into appropriate clothing and makeup choices prior to tryouts is meant to be exclusive to Jazmine and anyone else who isn’t blonde, white and under 115lbs.

Just because the tryouts were open to everyone and things like hair styles are oppressively restricted to “straight or curled” doesn’t mean that Jazmine might be, I dunno, projecting just a tad. How do we get Jazmine to understand that there will be plenty of brunets and perfectly unoffended Asians trying out?

Oh who am I kidding that’ll never happen. Let’s just not risk offending anybody and reissue the infographic with an amorphous blob instead of a cheerleader. Hell, since gender is just a fake social construct anyway why not just use a picture of a hairy, 300lb, shirtless truck driver and that will clear things right up.

Share if you think these guidelines are NOT racist

Thomas Holmes is a noteworthy writer who always lampoons the lunatic left with his viral posts.