Joe thinks that the new slogan is the bee’s knees, so he had it painted on his campaign bus.
Cue the “OK Boomer” comments from anyone younger than Biden.
Seriously, how old are his campaign advisors — 136?!
Give or take.
It depends on which grandfather it was that used to say “malarkey” all of the time. If it was his maternal grandfather, Ambrose J. Finnegan, then yes 136 would be correct. If it was his paternal grandfather, Joseph H. Biden, then it would only be around 126; a real spring chicken next to Ambrose, right?
Joe admits that he got the inspiration for his “No Malarkey” tour from his Irish grandfather, which makes it more likely that it’s Ambrose Finnegan who used the phrase.
Joe Biden: "Folks, I'm on what we're referring here as I guess it's my Irish ancestry, when my grandfather would really think something is full of you know what, he'd say 'that's a lot of malarkey.' So we're on a No Malarkey tour, meaning we're telling the truth." pic.twitter.com/lEgvAfFr7s
— The Hill (@thehill) December 1, 2019
“Back in my day, campaign slogans used to actually mean something, dagnabbit!”
Way to nab that youth vote, Joe. Nothing says “I’m not decrepit” like the word “malarkey.”
— Joe Biden (@JoeBiden) November 30, 2019
Joe’s been sounding pretty old lately, and this new slogan is just making him look positively ancient.
Since he launched his campaign, Sleepy Joe has been slurring his way through the nomination contest with some nonsensical blather about pomade, Esther Williams, record players, and haberdashers while not knowing the difference between visiting a website and a number to which one would send a text message.
- WATCH: Sleepy Joe’s ‘HABERDASHER’ Comment Reminds Voters That He’s VERY OLD
- WATCH: Joe Biden Thinks That Parents Turn On A ‘Record Player’ For The Kids In The Evening
- CORN POP: The Only Thing Funnier Than Joe Biden’s Crazy Story Is THIS Twitter Reaction To It
- WATCH: Sleepy Joe Shows His Age SLURRING His Way Through His 1st Campaign Speech
Sleepy Joe has always been a gaffe machine, but his memory seems to actually be failing.
- WATCH: Biden Say That There Was ‘No Hint Of Scandal’ In The 8 Years Of The Obama Administration
- SAVAGE: Biden’s Latest Gaffe About What Decade MLK And RFK Were Assassinated Was Shown No Mercy
- WATCH: Sleepy Joe Tells Moving War Story But He Gets Every Detail COMPLETELY Wrong
- Gaffe Machine: Sleepy Joe Thinks He Was The Veep In 2018? No, This Isn’t Satire
And in the new “woke” era, he’s got some views on race that some to his left are calling “problematic.”
- Sleepy Joe: The Gaffe Machine Cranks Up To High Gear… With A ‘Racist’ Statement
- Joe Biden’s Troubling History — The ‘Soft Bigotry Of Low Expectations’
- WATCH: Biden Gets Jackhammered By Kamala Harris – Stick A Fork In Him
In other news, Joe has moved from sniffing to nibbling…
YOU CAN'T MAKE THIS UP.
Joe Biden just NIBBLED on his wife's finger at a campaign stop in Iowa. pic.twitter.com/PcCqTMPJez
— Steve Guest (@SteveGuest) November 30, 2019
Ok, so that was just a playful moment with his wife after she nearly smacked him in the face.
But even that would make a better campaign slogan.
See? That would be epic. He’d clinch both the vampire and the Goth voting blocks and let’s be honest — they’ve been ignored for far too long.
And just think of the wardrobe! He’d have to find a good haberdasher.
You don’t buy an opera cape off the rack. That’s so gauche!