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Newsflash to Animal Liberation Front: Animals Aren’t People

“For the sake of clarity, let us be uncomfortably honest: to snitch is to take a life. By words and by weapons, each day lives are taken in the most egregious of crimes. When this happens in the courtroom, we call it “cooperation”. I call it violence, and I call anything done to keep an informant out of the courtroom “self defense”. — Peter Young, animal liberation prisoner

Over the weekend, a group called “Iowans for Animal Liberation” really upped the ante on animal rights. They targeted the most horrendous and offensive symbol of animal oppression. Dousing it in red paint to symbolize the violent death of our four-legged counterparts, these brave souls faced the most evil creation in the history of ever. That’s right, my friends. They met the beast head on. They, for several brief hours, managed to tame … the butter cow.

Their target resided at the Iowa State Fair. After unnamed individuals broke into the refrigerated lair of the infamous (and delicious) buttery sculpture and wreaked havoc, supporter Jerry Vlasak, a spokesman for the Animal Liberation Press Office, released a statement.

“The paint represents the blood of 11 billion animals murdered each year in slaughterhouses, egg farms, and dairies. We intend this action to serve as a wake up [sic] call to all who continue to consume meat, dairy, eggs, leather, and all animal products: You are directly supporting suffering and misery on the largest scale the world has ever known.”
Apparently they forgot about the killing fields or the Holocaust.

Call it morbid curiosity; I had to check out the Animal Liberation Front. Upon opening their website, the first thing the eyes are drawn to is banner at the top. Nothing gives you the warm and fuzzies quite like a hooded militant snuggling a pig. (Seriously, all I can think is “executioner” and “bacon.” Your PR department might want to tweak things).

Clicking through the various tabs, one gets the impression these people really think this is a war and they are soldiers. The more disturbing sections include pictures of various FBI agents and government officials. I can only think of a few reasons to put those up, none of them good or legal. Then there’s the section entitled “Snitches.” Peter Young’s quote sums it up nicely. I wonder if he realizes how much he sounds like a gang member or the leader of a drug cartel. Targeting snitches and FBI agents in the name of animal liberty? Someone’s been inhaling a little too much cat nip.

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Pauline Wolak

Pauline is a proud wife and mother of three. When she isn't being the world's greatest Girl Friday, she is volunteers her time as a school librarian and athletic director. Pauline enjoys football, politics, good beer, and arguing with anyone. She's a devout pro-life Catholic. Pauline believes in the 1st Amendment and uses it on a daily basis, most notably to ambush unsuspecting family members in political debate! You can find her work here at Clash and at Follow her on twitter at @MiStateFan.