Hillary’s Successful Crisis Management , or How to Screw up and Move Up

Written by Teri O'Brien on January 30, 2014

Any life coach will tell you, the key to reaching the top in our modern world is to model success, as in find someone who has arrived and use that person as a template. I mention our modern world because, back in the day, they didn’t have life coaches. They were too busy trying to avoid dying of starvation or frostbite. Today we have different, modern problems, like what to do about cutthroat competition and backstabbing, two-faced colleagues.

If there’s anyone who can provide a roadmap for navigating these choppy waters, it’s Hillary Clinton. She knows how to deal with being victimized by evil cabals of conspirators determined to destroy her and her husband. How powerful are the strategies I’m about to share? When Hillary’s husband, then President Bill Clinton was accused of taking advantage of a twenty-one-year-old intern who worked in the White House, she sprung into action, calling out those vicious conspirators and their smear campaign. On January 27, 1998, she appeared with Matt Lauer on NBC’s Today Show. Here’s part of that exchange:

LAUER: Let me take you and your husband out of this for a second. Bill and Hillary Clinton aren’t involved in this story. If an American president had an adulterous liaison in the White House and lied to cover it up, should the American people ask for his resignation?
CLINTON: Well, they should certainly be concerned about it.
LAUER: Should they ask for his resignation?
CLINTON: Well, I think that—if all that were proven true, I think that would be a very serious offense. That is not going to be proven true. I think we’re going to find some other things. And I think that when all of this is put into context, and we really look at the people involved here, look at their motivations and look at their backgrounds, look at their past behavior, some folks are going to have a lot to answer for.

Unfortunately for Mrs. Clinton, DNA evidence from what we can delicately refer to as Bill Clinton’s bodily fluids on an infamous blue dress proved that the allegations were true, and Bill was the one who had a lot to answer for.  Regardless, he didn’t resign and everyone decided to “move on.” Then Hillary became a U.S. Senator and the Secretary of State, and Bill became a highly regarded elder statesman! Where in the world is Matt Lauer?


So how do you do it? Just follow this simple roadmap.

Create a superstar image. 
Fernando said it is more important to look good than to feel good, and it’s also more important to have the image than to have the reality, an image that means “everybody knows” that you will handle any challenge brilliantly because, unlike the rest of the losers in this country, you are exceptionally smart, well-educated and über competent.

Up until very recently, “everybody” in the parentheses, my nickname for the East and Left Coasts, and even many people in actual America, “knew” that Barack Obama is extremely capable, unflappable, classy, articulate and extraordinarily intelligent, despite the complete absence of any objective evidence to support any of those assertions. That was the “Obama brand.” Despite mounting evidence that the quickest way to wring every drop of common sense out of a human brain is to subject it to an Ivy League college, it seems to help with this brand building.

Create an alternative scenario. 
When a major screw up occurs on your watch, present an alternative story. It can be only marginally plausible. It’s only there to create the impression that you may not be responsible. For example, after four Americans were murdered on 9/11/12 in Benghazi, Sec, of State Hillary greeted the victims coffins, and, in the presence of the grieving families, she said “We’ve seen rage and violence directed at American embassies over an awful Internet video that we had nothing do to with.”

We now know that the Obama administration knew within hours that the Benghazi attack was a terrorist act that had nothing to do with some YouTube video that almost no one knew existed. Was Hillary actually going to say THAT? Of course not! That’s no way to escape blame and help her boss Barack Obama get re-elected. Success means keeping your priorities straight, Kids.

Deflect Blame with Outrage
The use of feigned outrage is one of the favorite go-to plays in the liberal playbook for good reason. This tactic interrupts anyone planning to hold you accountable for screwing the pooch. It throws these unsuspecting suckers, who might have reasonably expected you to be contrite, off their obnoxious and counter-productive blame game. Your supporters will rally to your cause, inspired by your gutsy, full-throated cry “What difference at this point does it make?”

Accept Responsibility, Sort of
Arrange an event at a friendly venue to express your regret over what happened in that situation where “mistakes were made.” After all, how can you not feel bad when tragedy strikes? It’s not like you are actually saying it was your fault, something that you definitely want to avoid at all costs.

If Anyone Brings it Up Again, Remind Them That You’ve Already Accepted Responsibility
When you are up for that next promotion, there will almost certainly be some naysayers who try to say you shouldn’t be eligible until you explain how things got so screwed up while you were in charge. Remember, I mentioned those two-faced backstabbers, right? So, here’s where you remind everyone that the situation they are dredging up is old news, something for which you’ve already offered a complete and conclusive explanation, and even expressed regret. Boom! Problem solved.

These simple strategies will ensure that no matter how much you mess up and then lie to cover it up, you will retain the status of a bonafide A-player, destined for great things. As it turns out these tips are so powerful that they deal with all those pesky bodily fluids, including the blood of dead American diplomats.

Politics, Pop Culture, the Hottest Issues of the Day, and Your calls. The Teri O’Brien Show, featuring America’s Original Conservative Warrior Princess, Live and in color, Sundays 4-6 pm Central time  at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/Teri-OBrien. Daring to Commit Common Sense, Fearlessly, and More Important, Cheerfully, in the Age of Obama.

Image: Courtesy of: http://www.atoast2wealth.com/tag/president-barack-obama/

Teri O'Brien is America's Original Conservative Warrior Princess, and host of The Teri O'Brien Show, which debuted on Chicago's radio home for Rush Limbaugh, and now airs in the cutting edge world of online media, She is a yoga-practicing, 2nd Amendment-loving, bench pressing Mac girl geek, attorney, provocateur, author, and dangerous thinker. Teri is also the author of the new ebook, The ABC's of Barack Obama: Understanding God's Gift to America. Learn more at teriobrien.com.