Senator Dick Durbin: Smoke This!

Written by S.C. Sherman on June 28, 2014

Smoke ‘em if you got ‘em. Congress is contemplating banning smoking in the military. As if I didn’t already think Senator Dick Durbin (D) of Illinois was a jack-wagon, now he’s proven it fact. He’s leading an effort to ban smoking in the military. Sure we all know smoking is bad for you. That’s not the issue. It’s still legal for a citizen to smoke his little lungs out if he or she desires to.

The smokers of the world have been scorned, mocked, relegated to standing out front of some buildings behind others in rain, shine, sleet, or snow. They can’t smoke in most restaurants, they can’t smoke in most buildings, they can’t smoke around kids, they can’t smoke around old people or people with asthma, or on buses, or trains, or planes, they shouldn’t smoke if they’re pregnant, nursing or otherwise procreating, and definitely not in bed afterwards, you could fall asleep and burn your whole house down.

Other than that, you can smoke wherever you want. Let freedom ring. Smoking has been a part of the military forever. Being a soldier is a career choice wrought with a mixture of constant low level anxiety buried under a pile of boredom slammed with a few moments of sheer blood pounding excitement. You have to remain alert, so the cigarette has been a moment of pleasure and joy for the forlorn soldier for as long humans could roll it.

In the wisdom of our modern world our brilliant statesmen, led by Dick Durbin(D), have decided that we shouldn’t allow servicemen and women to smoke. Great idea, Dick! Let’s take away another right that all regular citizens enjoy from the folks willing to die or get blown up to keep those rights free. I must use the word, moron, from now on whenever I mention Dick-Moron-Durbin. Give me a break with this stuff!

I don’t smoke cigarettes. Never have. Don’t like the smell of it. I enjoy a Safari Cigar every now and then because I’m still free to do so, for now. I shouldn’t be stunned by the level of hypocrisy and stupidity that comes out of people who are Senators to these United States after all the junk I’ve written about, but I still am.

My father-in-law was a Purple Heart winning Korean War veteran. He passed away this year and we all miss his quips and comments. Nobody had a quicker wit than Al. Well he grew up smoking and chewing tobacco. Everyone he knew did. He smoked all the way through Korea. Before I got to know him, he’d given up smoking and was still chewing a bit, but he mostly just chewed an unlit cigar in his mouth. One day he was wandering through the local Wal-Mart when a young worker walked up to him and said he couldn’t smoke in here. He snapped. It’s not lit. The kid continued, apparently not noticing the hat that said KOREA big yellow letters. Well you can’t have it in her

I’m sure it took all Al could muster not to whack the kid with his walking stick, but he said something along the lines, I fought for my country in Korea and I’ll suck a cigar anywhere I damn well please! The kid wandered off and didn’t bother Al anymore.

We are a country gone wrong when we try to micromanage adult behavior and then apply a double standard to our soldiers. Does it make sense to send a guy/gal off with a weapon and gear designed to kill and destroy our enemies at great risk to themselves and then say you can’t have a smoke to relieve the tension because it might kill you? Illinois…please get rid of Dick- the moron -Durbin, he’s got to be embarrassing to many of you! I say let the troops smoke ‘em if they got ‘em! Let’s ban morons from office!

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S.C. Sherman
S.C. Sherman grew up a farm kid in rural Iowa. He graduated from the University of Iowa with a degree in Communications Studies. Steve is a business owner, and recently ran for Iowa State House of Representatives.. S.C. enjoys political commentary and great stories. He has written three fiction novels found at He currently lives with his wife and four children in North Liberty, Iowa.