Relax Everyone, Dennis Rodman’s Got the Situation Covered in North Korea

Written by Candace Hardin on September 7, 2017

Call off the dogs, the crisis is over. North Korea is wrapped up. Hooray, let’s celebrate.

No need to worry anymore, Dennis Rodman is going to save the day! He has offered to smooth things over with Kim Jong Un and his obsessive need to shot off missiles and thumb his nose at the United States.

The USS Ronald Reagan and the USS Carl Vinson, along with others from the Pacific Fleet are off the coast of North Korea with all their “fire and fury” capabilities.

Since Rodman “hangs out” with the dictator and enjoys hobbies such as horseback riding, skiing and karaoke, obviously the problem is resolved. NOT!

It is debatable as to how much, if any, pull Rodman has with his BFF, but if he does have his ear, he should tell him to stand down.

The Clinton administration bribed the rogue country with cash and nuclear options while claiming how good a deal the pay off plan was for the United States. (Right.)

The Bush administration used sanctions to some effect. (Meh.)

The Obama administration patently ignored North Korea and concentrated on lavishing love and cash on another, equally dangerous country, which is the Khomeini led Iran. (Deep sigh.)

Three for three, which brings us to one of the many reasons that fed up voters elected President Trump in 2016. (Regardless of what you hear from Hillary with her new book and dangerously unstable, cry-baby tour.)

Seriously, what are the stakes if Little Kim decides to throw his hat into the nuclear ring, trying to play with the big boys?

Of course, there is war with the United States and that can’t be good, but who else is on the losing side of this man’s narcissism?

The majority of the North Korean people will be collateral damage. That is bottom line.

Since the people look like concentration camp victims and live in perpetual fear, it is hard to say how unwelcome the end of the dictatorship would be or not. Obviously, if there was a ground war, Little Kim would use his people as cannon fodder and think little of it.

What about China?

China is North Korea’s largest ally, proving energy, food and other trade goods to the rebel country. Traditionally, China has opposed large sanctions against North Korea. While this seems to be in keeping with being a good ally, China doesn’t want the regime to collapse and give their country the responsibility of a refugee situation across their borders.

China also claims close ties with the United States but their recent criticism of the North Korean regime’s nuclear testing is straining the relationship with both countries.

South Korea and Japan also stand to lose if North Korea incites war with the United States. They are in very close proximity and in danger of fall out or even a nuclear bombing from the despot, as well as having to deal with refugees within their borders.

What about Russia? They are still willing to trade with North Korea, as is China.

As President Trump threatened to stop trade with countries who would still sell goods and services with NK, both countries have gotten their backs up and it is easy to see that the US will have no help from either corner.

What will the solution be?

Will the United States, (as usual,) have to be the lone heavy hand in this situation, or will China, South Korea, Japan and Russia step up as they could possibly be next on the kill list of Kim Jong Un and his claims to being a nuclear power?

As these other countries dance to the tune of playing both sides to the middle, while looking out for number one, the President is in a precarious position that was established by the popular habit of kicking the can of responsibility down the road.

Perhaps Dennis Rodman is the one we need.

God save the US if this is the best solution.

Image: CC by 2.0; Excerpted from:,_2001.jpg

Share if you aren’t particularly encouraged that Dennis Rodman is volunteering to make it all better.

Candace Hardin
Candace Hardin resides in Atlanta, Georgia. She is fluent in Spanish and a student of Latin and history. She is a columnist on and has a blog, Originally from North Carolina, her writing and beliefs have been heavily influenced by the Appalachian culture and tradition.