So many questions…
Mostly, though — what in the hell was this guy thinking?
Look, back pain is brutal. That’s well understood by most of us. And depending on how badly tweaked your back is, many official remedies can barely touch it.
Yes, we know the Health Care system in Ireland is really messed up, but … seriously?
This ‘cure’ is something one 33-year-old guy with chronic pain dreamed up on his own. He injected his back with his own semen… multiple times.
Great plan, genius!
On the upside, his ‘creative’ solution landed him in a Medical Journal, so there’s that. Enjoy your fifteen minutes.
“This is the first reported case of semen injection for use as a medical treatment,” doctors in Dublin wrote in the case study, titled “‘Semenly’ Harmless Back Pain: An Unusual Presentation of a Subcutaneous Abscess.”
The man’s handmade remedy was reportedly discovered when he showed up at a doctor’s office complaining of severe back pain. While examining the patient, a physician noticed the man’s right arm appeared swollen and inflamed.
The explanation the man gave was one the doctor likely never expected.
“The patient disclosed that he had intravenously injected his own semen as an innovative method to treat back pain,” doctors wrote in the study. “He had devised this ‘cure’ independent of any medical advice.”
The man reportedly said he had purchased a hypodermic needle online and had been injecting himself once a month for the past 18 months. Before visiting the doctor, he said he hurt his lower back while lifting a heavy object and gave himself three doses, according to the study.
The semen reportedly entered the man’s blood vessels and muscles. An X-ray revealed air trapped beneath the man’s skin, and he was immediately hospitalized, according to the study.
So many questions.
Like what kind of an awesomely twisted sense of humor does the author of that case study have to pull off a title like that?
Was he using the SAME needle over and over again?
‘Gave himself THREE Doses???” (Yikes. He’s been a busy little beaver.)
Bonus points to the source article’s author for the colorful use of the phrase “the man’s handmade remedy”.
One way or another, it is nice to have a break from some of the serious gloom-and-doom or Washington-Insider stories. Especially something as gut-bustingly funny as this one.
And it should go without saying … don’t try this at home, kids.
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