‘I Adulted’: Saying ‘Adulting’ Wasn’t Bad Enough, Now You Can Award Yourself Stickers!

Written by Wes Walker on May 1, 2019

Hard to believe the same nation that once Stormed Utah and Omaha beaches now needs stickers for performing ridiculously basic adult skills.

The kids can mock older adults all they want for gaps in their technology proficiency, at least they don’t need a sticker to reward them for showing up on time, or not blowing up at our boss.

It’s a real product: a sixteen-month wall calendar.

There are stickers for picking up after your dog, not killing your plants, keeping a secret and showering.

“My Parents didn’t pay my rent.”

I Cooked for myself.

I paid a bill on time.

Seriously?

“I Adulted! 2018-2019 16-Month Wall Calendar: Stickers for Grown-Ups”

They must have looked ahead and planned the May entry around the release of ‘Endgame’… ‘didn’t spoil the ending’ and ‘kept a secret’.

If you need outside help to remind you to pick up after your dog, or empty the litter box, chances are you aren’t mature enough to look after yourself, let alone a dependent animal… or, for that matter, houseplant.

Time to step up, buttercup.

It’s a big world out there, and unless you put on your big boy pants, it’s about to eat you alive.

The Effeminization Of The American Male
by Doug Giles


Doug Giles, best-selling author of Raising Righteous And Rowdy Girls and Editor-In-Chief of the mega-blog, ClashDaily.com, has just penned a book he guarantees will kick hipster males into the rarefied air of masculinity. That is, if the man-child will put down his frappuccino; shut the hell up and listen and obey everything he instructs them to do in his timely and tornadic tome. Buy Now:The Effeminization Of The American Male

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