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News Clash

Internet Invents New Game Mocking Jeffrey Toobin — Who Exposed Himself During A Zoom Call At Work

You know that nightmare people talk about, where they find themselves speaking in front of a crowd with no pants? This guy took that nightmare to a whole new level.

It wasn’t a private nightmare, either. Toobin’s coworkers had to suffer through watching a grown ‘professional’ man fondle himself.

CNN star legal analyst Jeffrey Toobin was suspended by one of his employers, The New Yorker, on Monday amid claims he was caught masturbating during a Zoom call with colleagues. While the prestigious magazine took action, another Toobin employer, CNN, instead issued a statement claiming he just wanted some time off.

“Jeff Toobin has asked for some time off while he deals with a personal issue, which we have granted,” a CNN spokesperson told multiple outlets after ignoring Fox News.

Vice initially reported on Monday that the magazine was investigating an incident where the legal pundit exposed himself to members of the New Yorker and WNYC radio staffs during a Zoom call last week.

“Jeffrey Toobin has been suspended while we investigate the matter,” a spokesperson for the New Yorker confirmed to Fox News.

Later in the day, Vice updated its story with the salacious detail that CNN’s top legal pundit was masturbating. But CNN’s story didn’t change. By 9 p.m. ET – hours after Vice changed its headline to, “New Yorker Suspends Jeffrey Toobin for Masturbating on Zoom Call,” CNN’s story had the same initial statement that the legal analyst simply needed to deal with a personal issue. –FoxNews

What did Toobin have to say for himself? Not much.

The New Yorker has suspended reporter Jeffrey Toobin for masturbating on a Zoom video chat between members of the New Yorker and WNYC radio last week. Toobin says he did not realize his video was on.

“I made an embarrassingly stupid mistake, believing I was off-camera. I apologize to my wife, family, friends and co-workers,” Toobin told Motherboard.

“I believed I was not visible on Zoom. I thought no one on the Zoom call could see me. I thought I had muted the Zoom video,” he added. —Vice

A move that idiotic deserves a good dragging on social media. And he got one.

We’ll start with the more serious stuff, and get to the open mockery further down.

https://twitter.com/BuniculaTv/status/1318367143864401920

https://twitter.com/ali/status/1318422583168126976

And here’s the open mockery.

I would also have included the one that took the ramen-eating guy who ‘helped’ Fredo Cuomo know where it said that protests have to be peaceful (he pointed to the Constitution) that showed how to turn off the camera, but I can’t track it down.

Here’s a relevant spin on a meme that’s currently popular…

https://twitter.com/MollyMiller951/status/1318373018314231808

https://twitter.com/PolitiKurd/status/1318342480010543106

Awkward…

https://twitter.com/MommyBigDick/status/1318358057441583104

Haven’t seen this guy in awhile…

https://twitter.com/ferociousmarket/status/1318279473842835456

File this under ‘self-help’…

The real kill shot, however was when his own employer became the delivery vehicle of his very public humiliation.

No, Garfield wasn’t supposed to be part of the game. (Still funny though. The Family Circus one was just creepy. We’re leaving it out. You’re welcome.)

 

Great guy you’ve got working for you there, New Yorker.

He’s doing wonders for your branding.

 

Wes Walker

Wes Walker is the author of "Blueprint For a Government that Doesn't Suck". He has been lighting up Clashdaily.com since its inception in July of 2012. Follow on twitter: @Republicanuck