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Dating In The Age Of Social Media

For any relationship of consequence, given that the chemistry is there, character is largely the make or break factor. Yet character is hard to discern when you first start dating someone. So often, one encounters “quick bailout” types, especially if the first encounter was via social media. When somebody wants to bail out early in a possible relationship, when you know that major aspects of your character have not been revealed, nor could even be surmised in so short a time, simply say “that’s fine.”

Err on the side of positivity: it takes a while to determine what kind of partner somebody might prove to be. Don’t be the one to bail first. If others are making a rush to judgments about ending a relationship, let’em go. Who knows what else they’ll derive without evidence and when else they’ll decide to bail?

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Conversely, a rush to judgment about going forward, however hasty, at least gives both parties more time to get to know the other, and so in that respect, it’s an excusable faux pas. If you truly want to know about someone, talk to their ex-spouse.

Many vital things in a potential partner take a while to discover, such as kindness, thoughtfulness, emotional support, respecting the other person’s time, sharing responsibilities and burdens, showing appreciation, being able to work through differences, living within one’s means, allowing the other person some slack, being good in an emergency, being a good listener, not issuing false promises, and staying loyal in the face of temptation, among other characteristics.

How someone could possibly ascertain a fraction of this based on a few encounters… well, as they say in the movies, “it’s a mystery.”

Jeff Davidson

Jeff Davidson is "The Work-Life Balance Expert®" and the premier thought leader on work-life balance, integration, and harmony. Jeff speaks to organizations that seek to enhance their overall productivity by improving the effectiveness of their people.

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