BAD INK: These Face Tattoos Will GUARANTEE You’ll Live In A VAN Down By The River

Face tattoos are a BAD idea in general. But when these people sober up, I’m sure we’ll hear the screaming.

These aren’t just bad tattoos.

These are HORRID tattoos.

There are the usual eyebrow and facial hair tattoos, which are NEVER a good idea:

You know they have pencils for that, right?

That’s disturbing.

Honey, even Groucho Marx knew when enought was enough.

Rainbows, really?

Cats aren’t any better.

Does she think she’s ‘Poison Ivy’ or something?

He’s just a little evil. No Dick Dastardly:

Ugh. That’s no better.

And then there are folks that are trying to convince you of who they are:

I believe it.

Sure they do.

Hmmmm… Is there still room for ‘Ironic’ on there?

Not just a ‘victim’ of Rock’n’Roll…

Wonder how that job hunting is going.

That guy seems to have given up on the idea of a ‘job’ altogether.

I believe it.

Truth in advertising.

I don’t believe it.

Thanks for the warning.

Speaking of messages…

Ditto, dude. Ditto.

There is this ultra-Patriotic face tattoo:

I’m a proud American, but that’s just too much.

People showing appreciation for what they love in the completely wrong way:

I’m sure Drake loves that you did that.

Did you have one too many before this tat?

That’s terrifying.  Perhaps it was intended as an homage to a beloved child, but it’s now the stuff of nightmares.

Speaking of ‘nightmares’ and ‘children’…

Is this a kid, or just a young looking adult?

I don’t even know.

Aaaargh!  I’m a pirate with a star-spangled bandana!

That’s just not right.

His’n’Hers stupidity.

Oh, dear God, no.

Not sure what you were going for, bro.  But, uh… That’s just wrong.

I’d hate to meet ‘Mr. Tattoo’.

And the ones that want to appear evil:

Hello, Clarice.

I”m not a witch, I’m your wife!

Wow.

Yep.

Betcha that draws the chicks.

WTF?  Why? WHY???

The same effect could be made with electrical tape.

I think I understand how that one came about…

That seems self-evident.

Dude, no.

That’s her boyfriend’s name.  If they break up, that’s gonna be awkward…

Not how you get into the Blue Man Group.

The brother of Sally from the ‘Nightmare Before Christmas’.

And this guy, uh…

Fan of Frankenstein’s monster?

What’s with the bugs?

What is wrong with these people?

Wait, is that butterfly made of penises?

That one is certainly a Career Limiting Move.

And the worst of the worst goes to this mess that doubled-down with piercings.  Many, many piercings.

Wow.

Those are the worst tattoos ever.

These folks should’ve read this first.

The Effeminization Of The American Male
by Doug Giles

Doug Giles, best-selling author of Raising Righteous And Rowdy Girls and Editor-In-Chief of the mega-blog, ClashDaily.com, has just penned a book he guarantees will kick hipster males into the rarefied air of masculinity. That is, if the man-child will put down his frappuccino; shut the hell up and listen and obey everything he instructs them to do in his timely and tornadic tome. Buy Now:The Effeminization Of The American Male

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