4 Reasons Why Bill Clinton’s Pitiful Attempt At Selling Hillary Is A FAIL

Written by S.C. Sherman on January 9, 2016

Bill Clinton could sell sand at the beach. I remember watching him do it back in the day before Obama-zombies became all the rage. Bill could look the TV or the audience in the eye and tell the world the sun was going to rise in the west tomorrow and you’d have people looking west come sunrise.

However, Bill has acquired a bit of reputation as a philanderer. A real ladies man, despite being married to Hilzilla. His negatives to her campaign have grown a bit, so they don’t let ol’ Bill out on the campaign trail too much. Things are getting so bad at Team Hidlebeast, that Bill’s positives are finally outweighing his negatives.

Bill was in Cedar Rapids, Iowa last Thursday schlepping for is beloved. Despite the visit being only 15 miles from my house, I sadly missed the packed event. I heard that it was packed out. Bill still draws a crowd. A much bigger crowd than his betrothed, which has to just drive her cray, cray. Anyway, Bill was in fine form. He delivers this stuff with a straight face and a raspy, southern drawl. The message was that his life partner, the great and mighty Hillary, is more prepared than anyone in his lifetime to assume the role of commander-in-chief. He went so far as to say this,

“She never touched anything she didn’t make better,” he said. “She’s the best change-maker I ever saw.”

Wow. That’s a pretty bold statement. I’m sure Hillary touching Bill would be an interesting change, at least for Bill. Sorry, I couldn’t resist. When was the last time she touched Bill? Take a number. Batta-boom!

In all seriousness, after his claim that anything Hillary touches she makes better, Bill enjoyed a plethora of head nods in agreement. There might have even been an amen or two amongst the clapping and adoring crowd. Over the years Bill has put old Hillary through a lot. They had to add a huge closet in their house to hold all the skeletons. So Bill owes Hilz a solid, plus he feeds on a crowd like an adulation junkie. However, I think there might be a few of us who would beg to differ with his assessment of his sweet wifie-poo.

I can think of a few things Hillary has touched that she did not make better. Four things immediately jump to mind. 1. Ambassador Chris Stevens 2. Sean Smith 3. Glen Doherty 4. Tyrone Woods

I think the families and friends of the dead in Benghazi might take issue that Secretary of State Hillary Clinton didn’t make things better for their families. Watch the heroes who survived Benghazi interviewed here. She looked them right in the eyes over a flag draped coffin and said, we will get the guys who made that video. All the while knowing she was lying right to them. She knew the video was a bunch of BS. She knew it was her fault those four guys were dead. She chose to let them die. Why? She knows that too, but hey, “What difference does it make?

If Bill says Hillary is the most prepared and qualified person in the history of the world to be president it must be true. Don’t forget that a lot things depend on the meaning of the word, “is”.

Image: https://www.flickr.com/photos/donkeyhotey/10927535583

Share if you think Bill has his hands full trying to sell Hillary to the voters.

S.C. Sherman
S.C. Sherman grew up a farm kid in rural Iowa. He graduated from the University of Iowa with a degree in Communications Studies. Steve is a business owner, and recently ran for Iowa State House of Representatives.. S.C. enjoys political commentary and great stories. He has written three fiction novels found at scsherman.com. He currently lives with his wife and four children in North Liberty, Iowa.